Length of piece of string inquiry confounded by lack of string
The cross-party committee charged with resolving the age-old question about the length of a piece of string does not have a piece of string to work with, The Mire has learned.
“The budget wasn’t there. Without a piece of string our hands are tied,” one committee member said. “We are a profound waste of time and money,” he added cheerfully.
However another member was quick to defend the committee. “Despite the lack of a budget, except for our usual expenses, we have worked hard to imagine the length of a piece of string,” he said.
“We have hypothesised vigorously on the subject and we will continue to do so until someone thinks of something else for us to do, he added.”