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The Mire has learned that Presidential candidate Sean Gallagher plans to invite school groups to Áras an Uachtaráin to drink the DNA of Charles Haughey.
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The Health Service Executive has advised the public to avoid being subjected to Bertie Ahern until a vaccine becomes available.
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Experts believe the Chinese economy is on the cusp of a miraculous boom after former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern visited there three times this year.
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Former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern has spoken of his disappointment at not being asked to stand as godfather to one of Rupert Murdoch’s children.
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Former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern has said he could still be elected President of Ireland if it wasn’t for Bertie Ahern.
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Unlikely sources have told The Mire that the Government is considering offering asylum to Libya’s Colonel Muammar Gaddafi if Libya takes former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern.
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IMF Diary: How strange. Dermot asked me to meet him under the portrait of Bertie Ahern in the Department of Finance.
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Self-celebrated supposed Statesman and amateur magician Bertie Ahern has announced he will not run for Dáil Éireann at the next general election.
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Internationally renowned surrealist comedian Bertie Ahern has said he wished he had known the importance of keeping tight control of financial institutions when he was taoiseach.
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